It seems like this has been my prayer over and over. "Lord, if it is Your will, let it be." I breath out my questions and breath in this prayer and move through my day trying desperately to trust that whatever happens this prayer will be answered.
But then answers come that aren't what I had hopped and I find myself living the tension of disappointment, but striving to trust. When jobs change, and plans fall through, and ministries I long for seem to out of reach, am I still praying "Your will be done."
When I look at the story He is writing in my life, will I trust that it is the perfect one for me. Will I cheer for victories in other's lives and not sulk that they aren't my own?
When once again my kids go to bed before their Daddy get's home. When we eat more dinners apart than together. Can I trust that even in this God is good and His will is being done? When thoughts of "this isn't what I signed up for" run through my head can I hold fast to the truth that, if this is God's will then yes, this is in fact, EXACTLY what I signed up for.